Creating the guest list for your special day should be an occasion for joy as you contemplate surrounding yourself with those who love you most on the day when you will join your life with the one YOU love the most. And yet, for most brides-to-be, this is one of the hardest parts of planning the wedding. With a limitation on guests, an eye on the budget, and whole host of obligatory invites, penning the guest list has been the undoing of many a beleaguered bride. But if you understand the etiquette involved, you should have a much easier time finalizing your list with less stress. Here are a few tips to help you work it out.
1. Immediate family. You pretty much have to invite everyone in the immediate family (on both sides). This includes parents, siblings, and even children if you’re entering a marriage with someone who has already started a family. Even if you have a sister that you haven’t spoken to in years, now might be a good time to extend the olive branch and repair the relationship by including her in your nuptials.
2. Friends vs. family. This is always a hard decision for the couple that’s trying to limit the guest list. Do you invite extended family or opt for your friends instead? Generally, cousins who have invited you to their wedding will expect you to reciprocate. Just keep in mind that this is your day. If you feel the need, simply explain to your distant relatives that you’re trying to keep the guest list small.
3. The question of colleagues. Unless you’re friends outside the office, there’s really no reason to invite your colleagues. Everyone will probably be more comfortable that way and you won’t have to slash someone you like from the list.
4. Friends of parents. If your parents are paying, you might not be able to exclude their friends. But if you’re footing the bill, feel free to say no.
5. Be sensitive to possible conflict. If your dad and your auntie don’t get along, that doesn’t mean you can’t invite them both. Just let them know that you expect them act like adults, set their problems aside, and put you first if they’re going to show up. They need to either get along or avoid each other.
